Jaws

"A Dude Talks To a Guy About Seeing Jaws"

I just saw that movie Jaws.  Scary stuff man. I’m not kidding.  That’s about as scary as it gets.  The whole part with the wife and the kids.  And then he’s got the job.  Scary stuff. The whole town’s depending on him. That’s about as scary as it gets.

 What about the shark?

The shark?  I don’t remember a shark so much.  Just a guy with a lot of responsibilities.  I mean that guy had it bad.  He’s got a wife and two kids depending on him.  A house he's paying for. 

I almost had to walk out of the theater, man, I’m not kidding.  It was terrifying.  

So what exactly did you find scary about Jaws?

I guess all the different people depending on the guy.  The responsibilities.  That kind of stuff freaks me out man.  He had a job that was controlling his life.  He’s working on the 4^th of July.  I have nightmares about that kind of stuff. 

  

Only Perverts Use Heated Car Seats

Every heated car seat experience I've had has gone like this:
I'll sit down in the passenger seat.  Then I'll think I somehow peed myself.  Then I'll say something real subtle like, "my ass feels weird."  Then the driver will turn with a smile and say real smugly like it's a little secret, "Oh, that's the heated car seat. Nice, huh?" And I'll say, "Yeah, definitely." but think you pervert.